When All Eyes Are On Me

4 Jan

We live in the day and age that regardless of our best efforts we are inundated with unrealistic body image ideals.  While I know that the pressure can be felt by both sexes I think the brunt of it is fixated on our girls and women. Mainstream media praises the efforts of already thin women getting thinner and applauds a size four for flaunting her  curves. This sends a confusing message to our already confused young girls and women. Let me just add here that I am not suggesting that ultra thin doesn’t exist in healthy realms. I am speaking of the extremes to attain it  and the misguided illusion that beauty is found in a certain size.

I am once again entering into a season where adolescence will soon give way to budding adulthood.  A daughter who is somewhere between Barbie and make-up and trying to figure out how that all works together.  It is a confusing time at best and hurling unrealistic expectations at them makes a challenging transition even more so.

While I am focusing on Jesus to be a better, wife, mother, and woman, her eyes are on ME!  How, in all my earthly insecurities, do I help her overcome hers?  Growing up I watched my mom succeed briefly and crash and burn on one crash diet after another and before I hit double digits I was joining her.  Healthy food was torture, treats were taboo, and a growling stomach at the end of the day meant success.  This was my inheritance.

I have made a list of behaviors to model in attempt to bankrupt my inheritance and add richness to the lives of my daughters (and future daughter-in-law, I want this to affect my son also) lives.

1. NEVER call an indulgent meal a “cheat” meal.  Enjoy the meal and move on.  No guilt necessary.

2. NEVER complain about a healthy meal. Again, enjoy the meal and move on.  No need to feel depravation because it wasn’t a double portion slathered with cheese.

3. Let them see and hear me enjoy that freshly baked cookie as much as that juicy crisp apple.  Food is meant to be enjoyed and treats don’t have to be eaten in private….there is NO shame in enjoying an indulgence.

4. NEVER complain about exercising. Instead, let them here me say positive things like, “What a great workout, it really challenged me.”, or, “It’s amazing how strong and energized I feel after exercising.”.

5. Never let exercising, beautifying, etc. consume my time.  It is a small but important time of my day. Set aside a reasonable amount of time for it. I want them to know that even in their busy lives this is something that is an important and manageable part of their week. I want it to come as naturally as showering or sleeping.

6. NEVER body shame-anyone!  Talk about how incredible God created our bodies.  All different, shapes, sizes, and colors-what a creative God!  Tell them that if we eat well and exercise our bodies will naturally find the size that best suits who God created us to be. 

7. To not be afraid of changes.  Different seasons of life will find your body growing or changing especially if you carry a baby in your body.  If the experience leaves behind physical daily reminders just count it as a blessing and a badge of honor.  Dwelling on what was steals from what is and what is to be.

8. It’s OK to have an athletic figure or a curvy one.  Just don’t get carried away with extremes.  Starving to be thin, exercising excessively, or overeating  are all behaviors that should be considered worthy of change.  Your health matters over vanity.  

9. Investing in your health and well being is something you always have time for. When you take the time to do things that help you feel good about yourself you will, in turn, feel better equipped to take on your day and to be the best you can be.

10. No matter the circumstance, you’re “Fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14)” by a God who tells you that you’re “His treasured possession” (Deuteronomy 7:6).  You’re worthy of love, respect, and joy.  When you pause and try to see yourself through the eyes of Jesus, it is there where your worth lies.

~Be Blessed and be a Blessing~


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14 Responses to “When All Eyes Are On Me”

  1. blmaluso January 5, 2015 at 6:56 am #

    Excellent thoughts for all of us to ponder. Especially for those with daughters.

    • Rebecca January 5, 2015 at 7:39 pm #

      Thank you, my friend! I pray you’re having a blessed day!

  2. Danielle (Come and Sit for a Spell) January 5, 2015 at 7:52 am #

    This came at a perfect time for me… thank you
    blessings ~Danielle

    • Rebecca January 5, 2015 at 7:46 pm #

      Thank you, Danielle for visiting and commenting, it blessed my day!!

  3. Karl D Rhoads January 5, 2015 at 11:23 am #

    Great post!

    YOU SAID: “While I know that the pressure can be felt by both sexes I think the brunt of it is fixated on our girls and women.”

    MY THOUGHT: I believe that whatever gender a person is, they feel “the brunt is fixated” on their respective gender.

    For us guys, it isn’t limited our physical appearance. We measure each other in other ways as well. We are are also expected to uphold high standards in education, career field, financial skills, social skills, leadership ability, material wealth, and many other facets that we use to adjudicated the worth and value ourselves and other men.

    But of course, that is the way of the world, it is not God’s way. As God said to Samuel, “But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the LORD sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the LORD looks on the heart.” — 1 Samuel 16:7 (ESV)

    Grace and peace to you and yours,

    • Rebecca January 5, 2015 at 2:50 pm #

      Karl, It is always such a blessing to hear your thoughts! I agree, men are also inundated with stress and pressure I can’t begin to understand. What an awesome responsibility God has placed on you and having external sources add to that has got to be burdensome….even when you know Jesus and where your worth lies, the world can still bear down on you and make you feel less than what God intended. Thank you for your wisdom and kindness and I pray that your day is blessed.

  4. Lorraine January 6, 2015 at 7:06 am #

    Isn’t it fascinating how one side of our face doesn’t match the other side? How one eye can be higher or lower, one nostril be smaller, one half of our lips and mouth can have different muscles that make us smile. As a former Quality Control worker I notice inconsistencies in faces. I can’t help it, it’s a fascinating thing to me!

    • Rebecca January 6, 2015 at 8:43 pm #

      Hi Lorraine! I agree, it is fascinating! How God brings it all together is nothing less than a miracle 🙂 Thank you so much for visiting, commenting, and sharing my post! You truly blessed my day! God Bless you, my friend!

  5. Lorraine January 6, 2015 at 7:07 am #

    Reblogged this on My Musing Words and commented:
    Isn’t it fascinating how one side of our face doesn’t match the other side? How one eye can be higher or lower, one nostril be smaller, one half of our lips and mouth can have different muscles that make us smile. As a former Quality Control worker I notice inconsistencies in faces. I can’t help it, it’s a fascinating thing to me!

  6. Wendell A. Brown January 8, 2015 at 9:39 pm #

    I love the message! Blessings!

    • Rebecca January 9, 2015 at 6:06 pm #

      Thank you, I really appreciate the feedback! ~Blessings~

  7. The Vintage Couple January 11, 2015 at 5:45 pm #

    Rebecca you really hit the nail on the head with this one. God didn’t create us based on what the media portrays beauty is. He created us perfectly in His image. Your daughter is going to be just fine. She has a great mom by her side! Sending hugs your way friend. ~Aisha

  8. The Vintage Couple January 11, 2015 at 5:54 pm #

    Reblogged this on The Vintage Couple and commented:
    My friend Rebecca wrote this phenomenal blog. I really wanted to share it with my readers. Rebecca is not only a awesome role model for young christian homemakers like myself. She’s a down to earth woman of the God. She’s also a homeschooling mom! Please check her out over at a sprinkle of love.


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