For much of my life my weight determined my quality of life. What I mean by that is, the heavier I was the less social I became. I would whole myself up hoping to just become a name without a face. I would slowly draw away from the circle so it would slowly swallow up my gap. I would become a whisper and a wonder. I truly felt my self worth was wrapped up to what the number on the scale dictated. With curtains drawn tight I spiraled into a pit of self loathing.
I have spent my whole life in a death spiral of one crash diet after another. Those consuming diets that steal all your thoughts and leave you watching the hands on the clock tick, tick, tick, ever so slowly waiting for the miserable days to pass. When a diet would finally stick, slowly the sun would begin to shine and I would again emerge vibrant much like a caterpillar breaking free from its cocoon. Life was mine to enjoy once again. I would seize every opportunity until it was time to repeat the cycle again.
I really needed proper perspective in order to reclaim my life and find joy regardless to what the scale said. Psalm 139:4 says, I am fearfully and wonderfully made, your works are wonderful. If God’s works are wonderful than so must I be. I am God’s workman, created to do good works, which Christ prepared in advance for me (Eph. 2:10). How am I to follow Christ if I am unable to allow His will on my life? I must recognize the voice of the enemy when he is whispering his sweet lies in my ear and remind him that I don’t walk of the flesh but of the spirit (Romans 8:1). For God has plans for me to prosper (Jeremiah 29:11). Do you see, there are no conditions to that. He doesn’t say I will prosper when I am 110 pounds, He says I will prosper because He says so! I just have to be a willing vessel for His love and goodness.
Being at a place right now where I would normally hide, I am pushing myself to keep letting the sun shine on my face. Letting God work through me for His glory. I am grateful that God’s grace is given to me in abundance. I pray for victory!
Can you relate? I would love to hear from you!
~Be Blessed and be a Blessing~
Rebecca
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So true!! I can definitely relate, sadly, and it can be so hard to come out of the bubble of “perfection” to let people in to our real worlds sometimes. Especially when the last time you may have seen a certain person was when they were congratulating you on weight loss success, they are the last people you want to run into… But, that type of living is so superficial and surface level, I’m finding, and trying to get outof the old habit is tough, but so worth it! Thanks for posting! It helps to know others have / have had the same things going on in their lives!
Thank you for sharing with me, it is encouraging to know I am not alone. I absolutely agree with you! May the victory be ours and God be glorified 🙂 ~Blessings to you~
Hi Rebecca,
Thanks for viewing our Ray of Hope Ministries web-site, Today’s Enlightenment (rohmnj.wordpress.com). You might also want to check our Bible study web-site (rohmbible.wordpress.com). We hope that these will be of use to you. We look forward to the insight that we are sure that we and many others will receive from your web-site.
God be with you, Patty Perez and Ray Gough.
Thank you for coming by my blog, Rebecca! I always appreciate visitors. Thanks for your post today, too. It really resonates with me. I am definitely a perfectionist,and when I feel less than perfect -whether it is weight or anything else, it steals so much joy from me. But if we let God’s perspective in, it really changes all that with His truth. Thanks for sharing – and for coming by!
Your beautiful and wonderfully made! Have you considered printing those scriptures out? I would put those scriptures on my mirror and read them out loud everyday. That would put Satan in his place, he hates the word of God. I enjoyed this post I can relate to it 100%.
I most definitely can relate. Thank you for sharing this.
Thank you for visiting my blog and I must say it is a blessing to see that others share my same struggles.